The Queen
♥ PhooiSze.
I have a great passion for both speaking and writing, hence making me a great friend but an even greater enemy. But even so, i am probably the best person alive! Why?
because i am biased, stupid. I am a PZ after all, hello?
Loves
Sweets!
Designing!
Pink. At least I am TRYING to. T__T'
Turning people into retards. It's my forte anyway.
Hates
Pink!
People who hates me MWHAHAH!
Craves
Laptop
Let's not daydream and move on ok? =)
My Past ;
March 2007
April 2007
May 2007
June 2007
July 2007
August 2007
September 2007
October 2007
November 2007
December 2007
January 2008
February 2008
March 2008
The Tags ;
Exits! ;
Kyeanies
Ariel
Britney
Billy
Kay
Li Shan
Colin
Nat
Ginny
Vivien
Sho
Sachie
Joie
Shaun
Yong Enn
The Credits
Images: 1
Brushes: 1
Designer: bubbles145
Base Codes: purpl3d
Wednesday, November 14, 2007
Care about me? I don't think so.
|
Sighs, sometimes I don't know what is it that i want exactly. when everything seems fine, I'll never fail to reason and debate with me myself and I. It's not me, you know. Not the evil side, neither it is the good side, not nothing.
I wish.
It's always like this. However happy I think I am this second, it won't be so the next. To actually sink into the moment and enjoy it while at the same time be thankful that it's all happening isn't possible. Not anymore. I'll always find reasons to picture the ugly side of it. The not-so-pretty truth behind everything. It's not that i am negative or anything although many of you out there would argue that I am in fact, the most negative person you've come across. [laughing is another acted up facial expression, you can't judge a person's happiness base on that]
It just dawn upon me that there's always an ugly side to everything. And nothing good last. Maybe it's the facade we hide under, never daring to step out of our comfort zones. Never daring to think for ourselves what might befall us should the happy-happy situation we are in turns ugly the very next second. To think if that's even possible. It's all the work of the mind, if you ask. It could be damaging emotionally, but for whatever it's worth, I'll call it self defence. You might think it's stupidity, but I would choose to call it insecurities.
Which isn't such a bad thing afterall.
I think the most succesful man could fall to nothing but his ego and pride which isn't called for most of the time. And ego and pride orginates from over optimism, don't you think? Some of you might disagree. Still, where does that lead to? Bigger house? Bigger cars? Better holidays? Go figure. Life's definitely way more than that.
To think further than all that's placed in front of you? It may be a long trip emotionally. But sometimes, the trip is worth it.
Labels: confessions, insecurities, One of those times I look at the stars and can't help but wonder
Your Lover's Lover 7:40 PM
Thursday, August 30, 2007
After all these years.
|
You obviously did not and will not change.
How many chances already had people around you gave you? How many times already has it been that I forgave whatever you did?
To hell with the phrase we must accept people with who they are, when you are too much, you are just too much.
If you have no initiative to do anything for yourself, you think *I* will help you? Sorry, but however easy the task is, I don't help people who do not help themselves. Yes, I am that kiasu. Kiasu in the sense that I don't want to be taken advantage of, just because you think I am nice, which I beg to differ because when it comes to these matters, I can be the worst person alive, which is quite fair after all. If you have doubts I am not a friend, think again.
Because there should be no doubts anymore.
You can, from this moment on, assume that's the truth because truth is, I am not sure how much of a friend I am to you- after all these years. Now ask yourself, how much of a friend were you not only to me but everyone around you?
Again and again, we are just going about things in a circle. There is neither a start nor an ending. And it was then I realized, no matter how much effort I put into making you understand certain things, you don't seem to understand, or rather, you choose not to understand. Brushing things aside will not make it disappear. Be a man and face hurdles ahead instead of running away every time. It's making everyone tired of it. And after all these time, I don't know why but I still trusted you. Maybe it was the faith I had that you will change someday.
But you proved me wrong. And i wonder if I can ever trust you again.
p/s: no names are mention so stop assuming its you or not you or whatever. I am just expressing what i have in mind in word form and it is for personal satisfaction only. It's not meant to make so and so realize it's him or whatever. If I intended to, I would have blogged in a much more demeaning manner.
How many chances already had people around you gave you? How many times already has it been that I forgave whatever you did?
To hell with the phrase we must accept people with who they are, when you are too much, you are just too much.
If you have no initiative to do anything for yourself, you think *I* will help you? Sorry, but however easy the task is, I don't help people who do not help themselves. Yes, I am that kiasu. Kiasu in the sense that I don't want to be taken advantage of, just because you think I am nice, which I beg to differ because when it comes to these matters, I can be the worst person alive, which is quite fair after all. If you have doubts I am not a friend, think again.
Because there should be no doubts anymore.
You can, from this moment on, assume that's the truth because truth is, I am not sure how much of a friend I am to you- after all these years. Now ask yourself, how much of a friend were you not only to me but everyone around you?
Again and again, we are just going about things in a circle. There is neither a start nor an ending. And it was then I realized, no matter how much effort I put into making you understand certain things, you don't seem to understand, or rather, you choose not to understand. Brushing things aside will not make it disappear. Be a man and face hurdles ahead instead of running away every time. It's making everyone tired of it. And after all these time, I don't know why but I still trusted you. Maybe it was the faith I had that you will change someday.
But you proved me wrong. And i wonder if I can ever trust you again.
p/s: no names are mention so stop assuming its you or not you or whatever. I am just expressing what i have in mind in word form and it is for personal satisfaction only. It's not meant to make so and so realize it's him or whatever. If I intended to, I would have blogged in a much more demeaning manner.
Labels: friends, One of those times I look at the stars and can't help but wonder
Your Lover's Lover 10:45 PM